today I’ve been thinking about how much I hate it when I hear people use Starbucks terms at non-Starbucks coffee establishments. outside of Starbucks, there is no “tall” coffee. it’s a SMALL. to borrow a phrase from the philosopher peter griffin, this really “grinds my gears.”
(sidenote–isn’t “tall” a little misleading, Starbucks? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU.)
anyway, the philistines who do this make me want to set myself on fire. and the people who work at the other non-Starbucks establishments just role with it! they’re all like “sure, I’ll get you your TALL coffee at this place that ISN’T STARBUCKS.” if I worked in a plain old coffee shop, I’d probably beat the crap out of any person who applied the Starbucks vernacular to real life. this is probably why I don’t work in a coffee shop.
here, I have made a venn diagram to below reinforce the fact that I do indeed remember some things from elementary school and to further illustrate how I feel about these terrible scourges upon humanity.
for those of you who don’t know how to read a venn diagram, you will see above there is the real world, and then there is Starbucks. the magical place where Starbucks and the real world overlap is populated by idiots.
anyway, I know I am not the first/the only person to feel this way. but I am probably the first person to present my hatred in the form of a venn diagram.
